I Don’t Have a Face For Radio

Sometimes I really dispair. I really do. More often than not, radio studios are filled with goblins. Ugly people. Yawh, people with protruding jaws, oversized eyeballs and greasy hair like the Killer Kenny and Joe Duffy. And let’s not get near the trendy-casual dress they insist on wearing. Someone call in Trinny and Susannah to tarten them up.

That’s why I really love getting radio time on Newstalk when Shiny Sean has a hangover. I get to show the drab coops and terminally depressed researchers what showbiz is. The poor dears. Not a looker, hoofer or hooker amongst them. And Oh My God, if I get another Henry hug, it’ll be too soon.

You see, I don’t have a face for radio, but maybe I can help tarten up their mugs. Now, to spike Sean’s smoothie.